This Journal is rated M for Mature

It took him a little while to finally blow up, but he finally did. Mom believed that he'd grown up a bit, become a bit more mature during the two and a half years I'd escaped him, and I suppose he did. I mean, my little sister isn't as bad off as I was... she almost seems a little pampered... but that's not really it. She started with Jeff with a clean slate and Jeff treated her like a child of his own.. I started with Jeff as a child who misguidedly wondered why he should be getting a new father, and Jeff treated me like the little brat who was just part of the deal...

I'm 24, and I'm trapped at home. I'm trapped at home because I can't get a job. The reasons I can't get a job are many, but it doesn't even come down to gas prices at this point. It comes down to my parents being unable (or, rather, unwilling) to spot me money for my car insurance. Sure, I could, drive my car, but that wouldn't be that great of an idea now would it?

So, even though I can fill out applications online, it doesn't matter to Jeff. When he sees me, I'm at the computer, probably on AIM, or drawing, or maybe playing a game... or I'm watching TV, a DVD, or playing a game on the Television. Forget for a moment that looking for a job involves a lot of "The Waiting Game"... I'm not about to lounge around the house doing absolutely nothing, punishing myself, just because I don't have a job. I'm going to do things to fill my free time because sitting around just wouldn't cut it... and I'd go insane.

And, for those of you who haven't looked for a job in a while (which shouldn't be many of you with Bush as President), The Waiting Game goes something like this... You go in to a place and get an Application. Maybe you fill it in there, maybe fill it out elsewhere and bring it back, but then you go into waiting. Most Applications hang around in circulation at a business for two months to three months. This means that you can call about your Application for all of that time, and then you have to fill out a new one so that you're still on file. I usually call bad on Monday, Wednesday, or Friday myself.

Jeff went so far as to call me a freeloader today, and preach about how he knows me, and how he's right, and all of that other shit. If I could leave [again] I would. I've been trying to get away and stay away for many years, but it just hasn't worked out. I went to [William's cousin] Jeff's for a weekend, Ben's house for fourteen days, and Robert and John's for two and a half years. At every location I tried not to be a burden, and I think I mostly succeeded.

I was also happy.

I miss living with Robert and John... though they're having troubles of their own, I wish I could still be in that kind of environment. They want it to be just them, and I can respect that. They're brothers, and I'm just a friend, and that's just how it is... I do wish I could journey down to Columbia and try and find a job there, but they don't seem to keen on the idea of someone else being in that little Apartment, and I don't blame them. It doesn't seem as big as the old one (though I never went to the second floor during my only visit). If I went down there and found a job, I wouldn't be able to live on my own... You just can't do much with little more than minimum wage, you know?

Even if you get hired Full Time, that's 40 hours a week of flipping burgers or some such, multiplied by about 5 dollars an hour (after taxes), which comes out to $200 a week. That's a grand total of $800 a month, and a lot of time of your day, your week, doing a shitty job, getting paid shitty. I've always been a fan of free-time, you see, but that's not really the problem. Forgetting for a moment no one hires me for jack shit, even if they did, I'd hate working there. I have no skills, and I've been in those conditions before... it's not really worth it... I don't think I could live doing a McJob like John or [William's] Jeff seem to be able to do.

Assuming my math is right (and I'm not), that leaves me with about $300 spending money for food and drink and everything else. Add to that I'd be living alone... and while I'm not fond of living at home, I don't like the idea of living in an empty place with no one else. Even if I hooked up with one of those little shits from school who used to pick on me, it'd be someone to talk to...

I wish Robert and John could reconsider... but they're not in a position too, nor does it particularly sound like they're up for having me around again. I don't think they really believe I could get a job either... and in their current location, I guess they don't really have any place to put me. Like I said, the old Apartment was bigger.

Oh well... I guess I'm done for now. I understand that things can always be worse... look at New Orleans, you know? But, for me personally, this is pretty bad... Sure, I have enough to make a normal person happy... TV, Cable, a Computer, Games, etc... but I don't really care about all that. What I care about is what makes me happy, and what makes those I care about happy. I want to leave this house and never come back. It's not going to work out here, and it never will... and I don't need to be causing all this negative energy and bad mojo around my mom and little sister. They don't need this shit anymore than I do.

Best I can figure, Jeff was "fine" when I wasn't here. I should never have come back... I should have gone with Robert and John and helped them pick out an Apartment, and tried to get a job... but I didn't? Why didn't I? Because I don't think anyone will hire me... I might be optimistic about lots of things, but not about getting a job. Like I said, I have no skills... none. You can't get a job without skills and you can't get skills without a job (as a general rule)... but as it stands, I should have fucking risked it. I should have gone with them and tried to find something. Roommates are the key to making it "on your own"... because otherwise, you wont be making enough money to do it and feel safe if one of you looses a job or something.

So, yeah... Journal's over... comment if you want... nothing really seems to change anything...

See you in the Future,
—The One True Huntermun


Open Discussions:
Which Port Is It? - How good games go bad.

Game Reviews
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

Stuff I Owe People
=guyver47 (2) - An image for her Birthday (0%). An image for being my 2,000th Hit (20%).
~VelvetMaiden (1) - An image of her character Nemo for being my 2,509th Hit (0%).
~LesserZ (1) - An image of Lesser Z Versus Huntermun (0%).
=ankishinzoutu (1) - Trying to get into his Tournament (I think).
~MajorMoonie (1) - A picture of Huntermun in his Annoucer cloths, to help with his Tournament (25%).
~Kumitekey (1) - An Art Trade... do a pic of his Fursona and he does some action pic of Huntermun (57%).

Obligatory Friend Icons of the Day!




Every 500 Hits is a New Winner!
Every 500 Hits, you've got the opportunity to get a free picture out of me. It can be a picture of anything [within reason]. What you do is take a Screen Shot and put it in your Scraps. You send me a link in a Note, and what you'd like as a pic, and I'll hook you up. In addition to this rule is an add-on... someone might not realize that they're a 500 Hit... if this is the case, then you can still do the Scraps » Note for, say, 3,001 if you want. Just realize that if 3,000 sends me a note a bit later, they "Out Bid" you... but since I want people to win, I've made this new rule. This goes out to anyone +50 of my 500 Hit. Past 3,050, no one can win for 3,000... get it? Good. n\_/n